The other night, one of the Dive Bar's Regulars stumbled in at sat on the stool next to me. Oh Jesus.
"Old Whitey" is about 85, and like most old men I know, thinks he is a Great Sage of Life's Wisdom or "The Funniest Man in the World". Unfortunately for me, Whitey thinks he is both. And he Ain't.
Although Zeke has met PLENT of people in life, who have examined the world as they moved through it, and learned how it works, THIS GUY, for the most pasrt, ain't one of them.
Now don't look at me like that: Zeke LIKES old people storys. In general.
But Whitey...not so much.
He ALWAYS tells the same stories. About the War. Blah blah blah.
And he trys to tell jokes too, but only tells the ones that offend somebody. And usually they aren't even that funny. Mostly they are about beating up Dames, Rape or killing foreigners in funny ways. Some times he sings old and unfunny songs about Bombing Something. Like Iran. What a card. He thinks.
Although I know Whitey thinks he is a Stitch, he is alone in that belief.
Most people get up and walk away from Whitey, but Zeke thinks he has something to teach us, after all he DID make it to be the GOP Presidental Candidate this year somehow. Although I think he might be just be making that up too.
After all, he's kind of nuts and forgets where the hell he is sometimes. And he always forgets his teeth on the Bar.
Man I hope he ain't the actual GOP nominee for the White House, 'cause if they think this Cranky, Old, Confused, Offensive, Ill-tempered coot can be the President, they have lost their fucking minds at the RNC.
Seriously. 'scuze my French.